The Grass Is Greener on the Other Side

Yup, we all should immigrate to canada. Multicultural, cool as hell, laid back, pretty, and yes much more laid back marijuana laws thats why the grass is greener on the other side. Setting up my cousin, Nendo of  Sucky, Sucky, Five Dollar fame for an undergrad at Uninversity of British Columbia, Vancouver via a pit stop at Toronto to meet my 7-year old cousin gave rise to the best trip ever.

The kin: My cousin is the cutest little fella alive. He was adorable, I got him a mini-guitar, a toy mustang, and baseball mitts. He loved the gifts. He stuck to me like velcro for 3 days. We hung out in a playground where I taught him to splash mud around, and then roll in it. We made a trip to Niagara, which was breathtaking, and yes, the american side is like sitting in the back seat of a mustang whereas the canadian side is more like driving one, all in all the american side is like going to a party you werent really invited to. The next day was a trip to the mall, where the seven-year old was taught how to spot a pretty woman, and watching charlie and the chocolate factory. The movie was awesome, disturbing though in johnny depp's resemblance to Michael jackson who happens to let children into his home/castle (spot a similarity?) and the overall make-up that depp sported. At times I could hear depp scream "I'm bad, I'm bad, you know it, you know it". and then naming the characater, Willy Wanka, does that have anything to do with wanking his willy? I sure hope not! The songs were very bollywood, with cheesy dance steps but I guess they are directed by an indian dude, and it was a bunch of fun anyways. The next day was marked by boys' day out on the field visiting toronto on a double decker. Abhikun is a chick-magnet. Wherever we went girls came up to us to say how cute we look when we play. I fed them stories of how i am 25, he is 7, and his mom left me when I was 18 and that she was japanese. When they dint believe me I made abhi talk in japanese and converted the disbelievers.  All in all, his company was awesome, he made me his role model, copied everything I did. Told his mom a day after i arrived that a girl on the bus was "his girl" coz  at one point I told him that I was talking to "my girl" on the phone. We gelled his hair so that he could look more like me, and he also said "daaaamn" a coupla times. The finale was while watching charlie and the chocolate factory: I had been sipping coffee all day on an empty stomach,  and had a layer of nasty cough in my throat. We both went to relieve ourselves in the restroom before the movie adnd stood in adjacent stalls.  While taking a leak, I kinda spit into the urinal to relieve my cough, kiddo obviously thought that he needed to do the same, and took a huge spit that dint make it too far so we all know where that fell, then he got extremely upset that he had spit all over his equpiment, it was hilarious. Its fun to a be a role model, was fun to play with a kid, this time it was more fun that it ever has been, I guess I really am 25! Last but not least, the kid has a tongue longer than that of kiss's lead singer, I kid you not. He wil be the best kisser in the world!

 

Toronto the place: The place is too cool for words, the women are too hot for words,  its like a cool New York! I was amazed! I live in the DC area. This place is teeming with Indian and Chinese restaurants. I walked by a Chinese restaurant in Toronto and it was called "Ho Lee Chow!", an Indian restaurant named "Khanasutra." Now, in my opinion that is just bloody cool. I am tired of restaurants being named China Garden, China town, India Bistro, but this place is cool enough to don a name that boasts the intellect of its customers. A welcome breeze was Canada!

 

 Vancouver:Vancouver was simply the bomb. The first day I met up with T, one of my closest guys from my Roorkee days. Lunch with Nendo was at a campus place called the village, where there was indian fast food, taiwanese, chinese, cantonese, mandarin, and greek next to each other for under 5 bucks with pop (canadian for soda). Campus is flanked by a beach besides the mountains necessitating a 16 storey hike down to visit it, simply poetic in its beauty. And yeah, clothing is optional! While we were at the beach, there tons of asian (some clothed), and white (few clothed) people but just one black dude (clothed) there with 4 women(unclothed) for obvious reasons. T and I (clothed) were the darkest people people at the beach besides him. When he crossed us he tells his women, "Ladies, these gentleman have the second and third largest penises on this beach!" and the girls echoed "Hell, ya!". Amidst all the fun, we never lost track that we were there to set up Nendo, but our worries about him were terminated when he was assigned a dorm room on the 6th floor with 22 female, and 5 male floormates. Seems like, sucky sucky aint gonna be no problem no more!

But the funnest part was yet to come.  In the morning before hitting the shower i was playing Pearl Jam (MY MOSTEST FAVORTITEST GROUP EVERRRRRR) and T said that they might be in town, and at 5:00 that evening we found out that they were hitting the stage in a couple of hours. At at the last minute we got floor tickets for the show. The show deserves a separate article, but yeah it was the best show ever, every song had a different ending from the studio recording.

So all in all, nothing could make the trip better, but I had an incentive to come back here so was excited about returning, but the incentive vanished. For a later chat.